Heads Up South-West connects families within our local school communities who are

concerned about the harmful effects of social media and smartphones on our children and

teenagers. The schools' P&F or P&C groups (Parents & Friends/Community) will coordinate the alliance at each school.

We make a commitment to each other to delay giving our children smartphones until at least the end of school Year 8, and access to social media until they’re 16 years old (this is a legal requirement in Australia now). Together, we're choosing to wait and to support each other in this commitment.

We believe in a childhood that is connected to the real world through healthy play, strong

relationships, nature, movement and imagination. They're the things that build confidence,

curiosity and resilience. These are proven to be the most important contributors to good

mental health.

This is a voluntary, good-faith pledge. We understand that every family has different needs

and that exceptions (e.g., for health, safety, or family separation) may apply. If you are a

parent who needs to provide your child with a phone, there are safety measures you can

take, and phone models that provide less access/higher control options.

Heads Up South-West is part of a national network of similar parent alliances across

Australia known as the Heads Up Alliance.

There are numerous important reasons to delay smartphones and social media use for

children and young teenagers.

Smartphones, social media and AI chatbot companions:

• Are designed to hook children in and be used habitually

• Make children less social (social “de-skilling”) and inhibit the formation and

nurturing of real-world connections and friendships

• Shorten their capacity to focus and learn

• Escalate their risk of anxiety, loneliness, self-harm and depression

• Facilitate bullying

• Expose children to extreme violence, sexualised content and hardcore

pornography – things we’d never want them to see at this age

• Significantly increase the risk of being contacted and groomed by paedophiles. Smartphones and social media provide a gateway for sexual exploitation and sextortion.

• Change the physical architecture of their brains

• Increase stress in children by pressuring them to maintain a curated online

image and maintain “streaks”

• Distract children from deep reading and comprehension

• Make it harder for children to rest and sleep

• Get in the way of younger children's playtime and older children's sports activities

• Contribute to bad posture and childhood obesity as well as eye strain/myopia

• Shrink quality family time

• Lower children’s self-esteem (by forcing them to compare themselves to

fake/unrealistic beauty and lifestyle standards on social media)

The peer pressure on our children to have a smartphone and social media, and their fear of

missing out on online social interactions with friends, is enormous.

Even though many parents feel uneasy about social media and smartphones in young

hands, our children’s incessant pleading can cause us to doubt our decisions. Which parent

hasn’t been subjected to the “but-everybody-else-in-my-grade-has-an-iPhone” spiel? We

begin to wonder if we're unfairly isolating our children from their friends and some of us

end up giving in to our children’s demands.

However, is it actually true that “everybody” in your child’s class has social media and/or a

smartphone? No – but it's difficult for us to actually know this and respond to our children

accordingly.

By forming a group with like-minded parents as part of a school's Heads Up South-West Parent Alliance, we (and our children) are finally able to see in a very focused way that there are in fact many families just like yours who have decided to delay social media and smartphone use. As parents,

when we see that other families have taken the same decisions, we can feel reassured that

we are not the only “mean parents” but rather that we have made sound decisions for the

wellbeing of our own families. We're also able to say with confidence to our children: “You're not alone, we know of at least x other children in your grade who also don’t have a smartphone or Tiktok, for example your friend Jack”. Hopefully that can also help reduce our children’s fears of missing out.

Forming a community with like-minded parents gives us strength in numbers and provides a place where we can continue to support and encourage each other to stay the course over the coming years. Heads Up South-West initiates the movement at local schools via their P&F/P&C group and connects like-minded parents within their respective school communities.

If you would like to join a Heads Up parent alliance, please contact your school's P&F/P&C group. Not all schools are on board yet, as we've only just begun the work, but we're onto it.

You can also help by starting your school's Heads Up parent alliance, just make sure you involve your P&F team.

More Information and Resources from the national Heads Up Alliance:

Heads Up Alliance on Facebook

https://linktr.ee/TheHeadsUpAlliance

UK’s counterpart movement “Smartphone free Childhood” has some great resources on

their website, too: Resources for Parents

By joining your school's Heads Up parent alliance you are mutually committing to other parents in the group (and indirectly to parents in similar alliances across Australia) that you will delay giving your child a smartphone until at least the end of school Year 8 and access to social media (including

Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat and Discord) to the age of 16.

You are not actively required to do anything more than making that pledge!

Your school's P&F group will connect you with the other parents of your school community that have joined. You can join or create a WhatsApp group to communicate with the other parents.

There is also a national Heads Up Alliance WhatsApp group with announcements relevant to the movement. You can sign up on their Facebook page.

Your school's P&F group might send updates in their school newsletter or other channels to support and help you maintain your commitment.

We acknowledge that for some families a phone is an important safety tool. A smartphone

opens up a whole new world of distraction and danger, however. For this reason, we urge parents to

consider a retro phone, a simple smartwatch or a "startphone" instead. A list of recommended phones & watches will be available on this website or in Anke's blog shortly.

If GPS tracking and safe zone functionality is important to your family, there are also voice/text/GPS

smartwatches on the market that might meet the needs of safety-conscious parents.

Absolutely! If your child's or teen's phone is a retro phone (also called dumb phone or flip phone) or a “startphone” (smartphone alternative) mainly used for calling and messaging only (ie. the phone is a tool and not a pocket-sized poker machine), you can most definitely still be part of the parent alliance. A list of recommended alternative phones will be made available on this website or in Anke's blog shortly.

If you previously permitted your child or young teenager to set up a social media account or

to have their own smartphone, it's actually okay as a parent (motivated by your love and concern

for their wellbeing) to change your mind!

Of course, the conversation will need to be sensitive to your own child's situation, but in an

alliance, it helps to be able to share with your child that you know of other families in their own class/grade/school who have considered this issue and have concluded similarly that it's better to wait until (at least) the end of school Year 8. The legal age limit for social media is now 16 years old.

If you think your child or teenager may be addicted to their smartphone and/or social media, you should seek professional medical help immediately and follow their advice about the best way to reverse course and heal your child’s or teenager's addiction. Joining a parent alliance might be appropriate for your family down the track.

The commitment is only a minimum commitment. Families can individually reassess their

situation at the end of Year 8 and determine whether or not they wish to give their children

access to a smartphone at that time.

The Australian Government has lifted the minimum age for social media accounts to 16 years, which sets a helpful new norm supporting parents.